I really do love mustard

 I recently had the opportunity to go with my home church to Lake Charles on a mission trip. Going in I thought it just our little group.  I was wrong!  It was a kickoff weekend for an event called FAMILY SERVE.  People from all over Louisiana, Texas, and a few other southern states came to minister to and tell people about Jesus.

I met some really fabulous people. Ashley and Blake...the sweetest couple!  Precious Ashley is a kindred spirit. They are church planters in Lafayette.   Just hearing part of their story from Blake made me love them even more. They moved from their comfortable big nice house to a fixer upper in the neighborhood they minister in.  Wow.  

Our church helped Sulphur Community Church with their Community Block party. It was a beautiful day to be outside.  Jumpies.  Food.  Snow cones.  Face painting.  And Jesus.  It doesn't get much better than that!!!  I was in charge of the face painting station. I love face painting. I really do.  It gives me the opportunity to talk to children and some adults one on one and build a quick relationship with them as each one sat in my chair.  As I painted superman symbols around eyes and crosses on cheeks, I was able to ask questions about if they went to church and what they knew about Jesus.  Seeds were planted through a simple activity that children love.

OH THE SWEET FACES.....

 


Then there was this one face.

 Face paint...check.  brushes....check. Napkins...check.  Water...check. I was set up ready to go.  Children...check. check. check!  It all started with one little boy wanting  a superman eye and it ended with a tear drop from an adult.  I started around 11:30. At 1:30 I realized that I had not had anything to eat since early morning.  I ask one of our students to please go fix me something. I would eat and paint.  I continued to paint while waiting on Jonathon to bring my much needed lunch back to my table. 
Suddenly I felt a tap on the shoulder.  It was my new friend who had been assisting me by adding what some of my paintings needed to make it just right. 

 He said "Hey do you like mustard?" Me "Not really." Him "Oh well I put mustard on it" Me "Well, I really don't mind mustard. I actually do love mustard."  Suddenly I loved mustard.  There he stood, plate in hand,  with a hamburger and a hot dog. The other hand had three bags of chips from which I could choose my favorite kind. 

How great the Father's love.  How vast beyond all measure. I saw the Father's love for me in this simple act of this child.  I was humbled at that moment.  I was there to serve him but yet a simple act of fixing my lunch was so much more.  I saw Jesus in the face of that child.  Oh to be like that child and humble do for others.  To meet people at their need.  What a great lesson to learn from a willing little boy. 

That was the best hamburger, hot-dog, and bag of Cheetos I've ever had. 

Overwhelmed by God's Faithfulness

 

Lately I have been simply overwhelmed by God. 
I am overwhelmed. 
Overwhelmed.
Overwhelmed in a big way.
Overwhelmed by a big God. 

The move has been something that I have anticipated for a long time. I prayed for a long long time that God would change my situation.  OH I loved my job.  I loved my family.  I loved my church.  But I was sad. I was unhappy.  I was fighting a major battle.

There were days on end before I moved that I would go to work. Go home. Go to bed when I got home in the  early afternoons. Get up eat. Go back to bed. Stay there until it was time to go to sleep.   Repeat the next day.  It was a rough time.   At the time I was going through all this, I didn't even know what I was fighting.  I thought I was just fighting sickness and fatigue from the arthritis.  It was more.  Depression.

BUT God.....

When praying about leaving the old hometown, I would pray (actually beg) God to move me. But there was this fear that I would move and still be alone and fight the loneliness. I would go from my little lonely town to a bigger lonely city.  I know that some people may not believe this but I was scared of being alone.  One of my dearest friends put it best when she recently said you feed off of people.  You get our energy from others.  That is so true. I love people.  I am a people person and I was retreating to my house daily. (Thank God for weekends.)

BUT God remained......

Over the last two years, God has surrounded with people who have become not "like" family but family.  It all started with one friend who ask me to join his church on a mission trip to NOLA.  On this trip God used a group of 3 men and one lady to speak words of encouragement and pray over me.  He gave me a roommate that would one day let me sleep on her couch on my weekend visits.  :)  God began to build relationships that I would need as HE transitioned me from one place to another.  God was "fixing" it so that when He was ready for me to move...there would be no need for fear of loneliness. 

BUT God remained faithful....

He knew exactly when it would be time for me to move. He knew way better than me. He knew I needed time to heal from old relationships and build new ones.  He knew.  He remained faithful to fill my life.

But God remained faithful and I am overwhelmed.

I am overwhelmed by His faithfulness when I walk through the doors of my church every Sunday and I'm greeted a sweet faithful man standing at the door welcoming everyone in.

I am overwhelmed His faithfulness for friends that would come late one night to bandage my hurt toe and help clean up the mess after a very long busy weekend.

I overwhelmed by His faithfulness for friends that invite me over for a home cooked meal, laughs, and good conversation. 

I am overwhelmed by His faithfulness when I enter the gym to watch three sweet girls play basketball and they are excited to see me.

I am overwhelmed by His faithfulness at every "Gumbeaux" church birthday celebration and every Sunday family lunch.

I am overwhelmed by His faithfulness when someone who has never met me shows up at the hospital to see about me and pray over me...and witnesses to the nurse as she ministers to me.  (And I had second visitor that I missed)

I am overwhelmed by His faithfulness when a cherished friend told me that she had never seen anyone adjust to a new city like I had. 

I am overwhelmed by His faithfulness when He uses someone's words to encourage each time we speak in person or text. 

I am overwhelmed by His faithfulness when I need family time and binge watch TV.

I am overwhelmed by His faithfulness as He continues to bring more people into my life.  

I am overwhelmed by His faithfulness everyday.  Lord may I never forget Your overwhelming faithfulness to work Your plan in Your time for Your purpose.  

Over the last few months I have been disheartened by the church.  It began to feel like a social club.  Cliqueish. I started asking myself why do I or we go to church.  To see our friends? To catch up? To study God's word? To worship? Because he or she is there? Because it's what's expected? Why?  Why is it important to be "in" church.   I've learned the  answer....

Last week I made a choice while in Guatemala on mission.  I decided on Saturday the first day that I would learn everyone's name and something about them on our team.  By Sunday night I knew everyone and a little something about everyone.   I love people. I love getting to know people.  It was amazing learning about each person.

I learned that someone loved lipstick and flip flops.
I learned that someone had a major lost a week before they came.
I learned that someone was starting a new career.
I learned that someone was struggling with a loss.
I learned that someone was really funny!
I learned that someone  was caring.
I learned that someone had been married a month and a day.
I learned that someone was loving.


Learning and loving.   On a bus singing, praying, and riding through the mountains.  In a center loving on babies.  At a day care center for adults tossing a ball. .  Getting to know each other.  Loving those that need the most love together. Letting down walls.  Serving beside one other.  Changing diapers.  Listening.   Thinking of others before yourself.  Laying your heart out before new friends.

The church is not the building. It's the people.  It's being outside the four walls.  It's doing and being the church.  It's loving and listening.  It's service and serving.

So what about Sunday's?  Sunday's are for bringing the church together to renew, refresh, and recived to go back into the world and be the Church.

Go be the church!!!

I am enough...I not meaning me!

"We don't want to fall. We want to see great testimonies of Gods grace but we don't want to be the testimonies."

I don't cry much.  I usually save it for one big episode and let it all go at one time.  I usually make up some excuse that I am tired.

Yesterday I was very tired. So I had a big ugly cry. 

So many things racing through my mind and my heart.

I had a long overdue conversation that was emotional.
People all around me mourning a great lost.
In a quiet season of my life.
Harsh words from a friend that still linger and hurt.
Feeling physically sick.  
Facing changes. 
There is a strained friendship.
All of this overwhelmed me.

All this I try to hide well.

But I was really stressing over a lot and felt like I would burst.  I could no longer hold it in and tears began to flow. I said out loud.
"Hey I'm having a moment. A cry moment."  I think they were both surprised. They listened to my woes and gave me advice, took my side, and said things to make me feel better.  But that is not what made the difference. What happened next did. 

As we getting ready to walk out the door, one of the ladies picked up her two new devotional books and told us about how good they were.  I cannot even tell you the name of  either one of them.  She picked up one of the books and began to read.
God has a way of showing up.
  I am enough....here is what she read....

I had a long overdue conversation that was emotional....The coming season will be extraordinary and filled with delight.

People all around me mourning a great lost and there are no words.....When darkness comes, I am enough to see you through the night.

In a quiet season of my life....When you are lonely and seek companionship, I am enough.

Harsh words from a friend that still linger and hurt...When the lies men have spoken bring disturbance into your mind, I will wash them away, for My Word is enough. 

Feeling physically sick....I am enough, I will be your wrap around shield in the midst of your difficulty. 

Questions about timing...What looks like delay after delay will make sense to you as the clouds part and the light of glory shines through.

Facing changes...I am about to bring you into a place where you have never been before.

There is a strained friendship....When your heart is troubled over many things, you must bring your soul before Me, for I am enough. 

Overwhelmed...You must know, My Child, that I am enough.  

I am thankful that HE is enough and he shows up at the exact moment to remind me that HE is enough.  
 

Whatever you are facing ....He is saying to you....I am enough!
How great you are, Sovereign Lord! There is no one like you, and there is no God but you, as we have heard with our own ears. 
1 Samuel 7:22

King of My Heart

I spoke at a ladies conference in October of this year.  God used that opportunity to continue to help heal me spiritually and physically.  

This is the testimony I gave that day.  

 Isaiah 26:3 You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord himself, is the Rock eternal.  

The last few weeks as I've been thinking and praying about what to say and the song KING OF MY HEART has been on my mind.  It's been on the radio I think every morning and every afternoon on my way to and from school.  The words say. "You are bigger than any battle I'm facing. Bigger than any thing I've been chasing.   These words really spoke to me. "

 KING OF MY HEART 

Over the last 4 years I've faced a battle that I couldn't handle.  I've had some really bad times.  Times I didn't want to get up out of bed.  I didn't want to face people.  I wanted to give up. Very low times.  

I stand today to tell you that but even in the darkest times God was there.  I couldn't handle it but with Him I can! He was fighting for me and still is.  He has surrounded me with friends and family that love me and lift me up.  Ministered through scripture that friends shared. He was there.  Through people that didn't even know they were helping.  He used times of worship and the Word to speak to me.  He was there.  He was there sometimes whispering other times shouting at me...I've got you.  

The song says He is bigger than any battle I face. But It also says that he is our hope.  Philippians 4:4-6 says Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.  

It would seem strange that a man in prison would be telling us to rejoice. But Paul's attitude teaches a big lesson.  OUR INNER ATTITUDES DO NOT HAVE TO REFLECT OUR OUTER CIRCUMSTANCES. Paul was full of joy because he knew that Jesus Christ was with him. It is so easy to get wrapped up in our circumstances and be discouraged. But we have a Savior who has fought for us and will continue to fight for us. 

Lift up your head God our fighter is on our side Christians!   Trust Him.  Psalm 20:7 says some trust in chariots, some in horses, but WE trust in the name of The Lord our God.  

Side-note:

After I spoke that day, a sweet lady called on  pray for me.  The ladies gathered around, laid hands on me and I was anointed with oil.     Hearing the voices of the ladies praying for me was amazing.  They prayed for courage, faith, strength, and healing.  They thanked God for who I am and how he made me. I felt the strong presence of the Lord surround me and fill me. I am thankful for those ladies, most of them whom I didn't know, for praying for me and lifting me up!  It is a day I will not forget. OH what a blessing!

Love --- don't use the word lightly.

This is therapy.

Love from a distance. A friend once told me this.  Yes she did. She had decided to love me from a distance.

My first thoughts...Really? What the heck does that mean!? Are you crazy cra?

Let's break it down.

What does love mean?

an intense feeling of deep affection

What does distance mean?

make (someone or something) far off or remote in position or nature.

So love from a distance means

To have a far off remote intense feeling of deep affection for someone.

That's just..... well crap. I have worried and thought over this until I'm done.  It got me ...nowhere.  

I have been thinking more about what love is. 

What is love? What does the Bible say? 1 Corinthians 13

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

⁸ Love never fails. 

What love looks like....

 listening to a friend vent. 

laughing over something silly. 

encouraging a friend to keep fighting.

a text just to say hi. 

a sweet smile when words are not needed. 

when a child tells you...you look pretty. 

sharing your lunch.

holding your hand when you are sick. 

getting mail that is not a bill. 

giving a tissue. 

a hug.

One of my students tells me every day that he loves me.  He usually tells me more than one time during the day. The conversation usually goes like this.

Ms. Laura Lea 

Yes

I love you.

I love you too.  

Ms. Laura Lea I love you to your heart.

I love you to your heart too.

Ms. Laura Lea I love you  from your head to your toes. 

I love you from your head to your toes.

Ms. Laura Lea, I love you to the moon and back

I love you to the moon and back.  

That's love but there is a greater love..................The LOVE OF JESUS!  

  

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16

For God so loved ME, Laura Lea, Lala that He gave His one and only son that if I, Laura Lea believes in him I will not perish but will have everlasting life! John 3:16

Now that is love. 

It's been a day and a half....

It's been a day and a half....ok it's really been more like forever since I blogged. But it has been a day and a half since I decided to start again.   You know getting healthy.  Getting back on track. Dieting.  Changing my lifestyle.  I want to be skinny. We all know the lingo.  We know the talk.  How you say it really don't matter ... the struggles are  real.  

Oh the struggles.  How many times can I start again? Start on Monday, cheat by Tuesday, wait for another Monday. Oh it's Monday.  I need to get to the grocery store.  I need to drink water. I need to weigh. I need to get to the gym.  It's Tuesday...I'm overwhelmed.  Monday again...I really don't feel like starting this week. I'll wait until next Monday.....oh the struggle. 


Yesterday was Monday.  I started again.  I did ok. Better than last Monday.  This Monday I started to the gym again. That was to say  the least was...AWFUL.  I finally made it after school.  Way after school.  I did everything I could first but I knew I had to go.  I had to start. The worse part? Trying to get my shoes on in the bathroom.  Trying to get my shoes and socks on in the bathroom was a much exercise as walking on the treadmill.   I need room to get ready and more than a little stool to sit on.  I finally got them on and I was out of breath.  I made it to the treadmill.  I couldn't get the headphones to work. I tried and tried.  Finally they worked. YES!  I started walking slowly but walking...then they stopped. I had to have sound to hear what Dr. Oz had to say.  Oops..if you hit the red button that says stop.. the treadmill WILL stop and so will you.  That was almost a tragedy.  Time to change treadmills.  Moved to the next one. Sound - check.  Time set - check.  Weight - Check.  Age - Check.  Here I go... 2 and 1/2 minutes in. My feet hurt. I can't breath.  I sound like I a herd of elephants stomping through a forest.  I think I might need to stop.  Oh stopping would be easy.  But I faintly hear that voice. "Don't give up."  That voice that I use to know.  The one that never gave up or gave in and pushed through all the struggles to be healthy, skinny. and fit.  The hard headed woman that could not be told she couldn't do it.  Oh she is there.  Just buried deep inside for a bit.  She's coming back.  I heard that voice saying FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT.  Slowly but surely I made it through.  I walked 20 total minutes.  I didn't give up.  

Today is Tuesday...I haven't cheated, I haven't given up, and I'm going back to the gym all the while hearing 
FIGHT
FIGHT. 
FIGHT

                                                                   

How I feel on the inside!

What I look like after exercise!