Friday, February 13, 2009

The grass is always greener...just enjoy the grass

I had a discussion with a friend today about the grass. The green grass. The grass is always greener on the other side. If I have this and you have that, I want that and you want this. HA!

I don't have kids or a husband. I want both. I want God to hurry and drop that man into my life. I want to meet and marry that man God has just for me. I want kids. I am being real honest. It bothers me sometimes when I get to thinking that all my friends have husbands, husbands/kids. I'm sure you have heard someone say...."Others have it why cannot I." " Ole' so and so have a great guy and she don't deserve him." "They don't take care of there kids....I am going to be a good Mommy....."

I have me. I have family. I love my family. I have a great family. But at the end of the day, I go home alone. Wait! Don't feel sorry for me. I have lots of family and lots of friends. I get to do whatever I want without asking or planning around them. I can go when I need to go and stay as long as I want.

OK so where does the grass thing come from. I want what others have and others want what I have. They would not give up their families. They want a few minutes by themselves. Time to take a bath without on knock on the door. Time to just sit in the recliner.

The point is that the grass is greener on the other side.

My friend make this point.
One person has a truck the other person has nothing. They would love the truck. The person with the truck looks at other person that has the bigger truck.

One person has shoes the other person has old ratty ones. The needy one would like a better pair. The first person would like the best.

See the grass is greener. I think what I need to work on along with millions of other Americans is to be content with what I have. I am blessed to have what I do. I have a house, job, food, and clothes. I may not have the best but I have what is best for me.
In Philippians, Paul talks about being content in all things in 4:10-12 but don't stop there....verse 13 says I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. So how can we be content? Focus on the 3 P's - Perspective - look what at what you have not what others have. Priorities - focus on what is really important. Power - remember you strength and contentment comes from Christ.

My grass is so green and I am enjoying every minute of it.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

People are so mean

I went to a ballgame recently. The guy behind me was mouthing at the ref. It was funny because most of the time he was right. But something hit me wrong. I heard him call out some names that bothered me. He was calling one of the players a name. Then he referred to one of the refs as the fat one. That one really bothered me. By the way, I know the guy that was sitting behind me. I am not upset with him but he did get me to thinking.

I cannot tell you how many times that I had heard things, mean things said to me. I have been called names to my face and behind my back. I have been called fat, a whale, Shammou. I can tell you those things are hurtful.

I can think of different times that I really got my feelings hurt. I thank God that he has let me forget most of the hurtful things that have been said.

I cannot remember a time when I haven't had a weight problem. Elementary school was no different. I was always bigger than the other students. There was this guy that I thought was so cute. OK I was like 11. I thought he was fantastic. Until one day. We were playing around after school and he called me a water buffalo. OH YEAH! It hurt my feelings so bad. That was it. I decided to ignore him and I didn't care. That started it. I would not speak if he spoke to me. It hurt my feelings so bad. Funny thing. He told his mother I was being ugly to him! But he failed to tell her that he called me an ugly name. Shame on him. But shame on me because even after that I still thought he was cute. Ugh! high school. I was at a local grocery store with a friends of mine. We talking and laughing with her boss the manager. Somehow the subject came up about me getting a job. His immediate comment was "she is fat." I am not talking about a child. This was an adult. ADULT in age but child in maturity. It took me a long time to even go back in. My mother and daddy did not shop in that store for a long time. I ignore him for a long time. But I have to think now that yeah I was the bigger person in that situation but not by weight.

On into college.....I was graduating from college looking for a job. At NSU, we had a teacher job fair where school systems came in and you could interview with them. Things went well that day. I interview with lots of parishes. Promising places. But one place would have had to be the last job in La for me to go to. The conversation was going pretty well when he asked me a question. I quote...So how do you think you can get up and down off the floor with those kids being that big? I was so shocked. How could a professional ask me that! He did though. Needless to say...I came back to my parish where there are people who love me for me.

Things don't change...when I first started losing weight everyone was so excited for me. But I had someone make a comment to me. I hope that they really didn't mean the way it sounded but it was hurtful. I was told that if I keep losing that then she would be the biggest one at work. It really bothered me. It was like saying you big fat thing. I think that she didn't mean it the way it came out.

So why am I talking about this now. You remember the old saying:
Sticks and stones may break my bones but words with never hurt me. Words do hurt. Wounds from sticks and stones will heal usually quickly but words hurt for a long time. Words cannot be put back in. I did a children's message one time using toothpaste. You know once you squeeze the toothpaste out, it don't go back in. The same with words. They cannot be put back in no matter how many apologies are spoken.

Be careful little words what you say because words do hurt.