Thursday, July 28, 2011

gloom, despair, & agony!

On the the gloom, despair, and agony part of this story.....

Remember the three antibiotics, a shot, and a tooth pulled and four days later.

That Sunday morning, October 4th 2010, was no different than any other Sunday morning. I got up, sat in the recliner, probably checked my facebook, ate breakfast, raced to church to get to Sunday School because I was teaching the youth that morning. You know normal for me. I don't remember what I had for breakfast, what time I got up, or what my status was that day but I do remember what happened about 11:34 that morning.

I was in my usually spot. On the fourth pew sitting with my Pro-Zack and AJ. Usually I sit between them but this particular Sunday it was AJ, Pro, then me. On the other side of me was a cousin of one our youth. Her first time at EBC. Yep...first time! Song service. Fine. Offertory. Fine. Fellowship. Fine. Good special. Fine. Guest speaker was there that day. BR549 was there but not preaching. I remember paying attention to him. I could even remember some of the things he was saying. I could hear him. I see him. I see BR sitting there. And there's Prozack, AJ, Diana over there, Jeff, Brett, I see Billy and Suzonne. Wait something is not right. I see everyone but there is something wrong. My ears are making a strange noise. What's he saying? Huh? I can't hear....
Me...Zack. I think I'm going to pass out.
Zack.....What?
Me....Zack I think Im going to pass out.
Me...leaning heavily on Zack...
Zack...what do you want me to do?
Me...Get my momma(don't forget Im on fourth pew. Mother second pew from back)
Zack to AJ....LL is going to pass out.
AJ...WHAT!
Zack....LL is going to pass out get her mother.

Me sees AJ get up and walk.

Me to Pat(in front of me) I need help I'm going to pass out.

Me passing out in Zacks lap!

Side note.....Now Zack will not sit by me in church or at least he will not sit AJ, Zack, LL

LATER....Preacher still preaching.
ME....hollering and begging...help me. something is wrong. help me.
L!et me explain how I was feeling the second I came to. I was so desperate for help. I remember my eyes being wide open. Panicked. Scared. Helpless. I needed help. I knew something was wrong and it felt like no one was working fast enough to do anything. I also remembering looking into Hero's eyes and wanting him to do something. I was clinging to Jenn Mac begging her to help. Looking into the eyes of my friends, wanting them to do something but them so desperately doing all they could to just calm me and figure it out. BTW...911 had been called by this time. People were standing praying. The preacher had stopped preaching and was praying. Everyone who had been with me was suddenly gone and a whole new set of people were there. I had my own medical team surrounding me.

(Time out.,..... You know I really believe our life without Christ is like this situation. Desperate. Sinking. Needing help.)

After a few minutes with the help of this great team and the prayers of my church family, I was able to settle down. But then all I wanted to do was walk out the back door! I asked Hero but he wouldn't let me. He said I was not walking out. So they made me ride out in a rolling office chair. Now if the passing out was not embarrassing enough. Being wheeled out in a chair topped it off!

That day I took my first ride in the ambulance. 1. I had to go potty. 2. I did not want to the emt to get blood on my dress! He did good.

I was admitted. Watched over night. Ran test. Sent to cardiologist. Stress test.
Results.....nothing. NO idea what happened. Hasn't happened again. Praying it never does.

The doctors seem to think that my body had overload. With all the medicines and tooth my body just shut down. I passed out then I panicked because it scared me so bad. There was no pin point reason to say that it happened. Not blood pressure. Not blood sugar. No explanation.


This was what I feel was the beginning of the one of the most stressful times in my life....

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