Whew!

My new Weight Watcher magazine came in this week. It stated that most Americans gain on average only ONE TO TWO POUNDS. WHEW! But it did say that "rather than the holiday as a day of excess, most American view the season as a 5 or 6 week opportunity to overeat."
I am going to try and change my view and focus.



Thanksgiving, I am going to focus on what I am thankful for. Super family, good friends, a fantastic church family, a successful year....
Christmas will be about the real reason....Jesus' birth.

I pray that we focus being thankful for what we have and what we have been given.

7 to 10 Pounds

7 to 10 pounds....I GOOGLED how much weight a person gains over the holiday season! From Thanksgiving to New Year's Eve.... 7 to 10.

That is not going to be me. I am determined to maintain or lose weight through the holidays. I am not going to be the average American.

I don't know how it is at everybody elses' house but at my house there is food out all day long! We wait until everyone gets there, then we eat. Round 1 starts around 12:30. Then more people come in and Round 2 starts. Round 3 continues after more family arrives. The family ends up eating all day. I know that I cannot do that.

I have to make some conscious food choices. I am going to eat lots of green...less ham. One trip and one desserts. I am not going but one round. Then after I eat I am getting out of the house and walk! We are going to my uncles. He has a looooong driveway. I may need to walk it more than one time.

I know that I can do this.



7 “Be strong and courageous; do not be afraid nor dismayed....................................................... for there are more with us than with him. 2 Chronicles 32:7

Taco Bell, KFC, or Subway!

Tonight was Weight Watchers Night. I usually go on Tuesdays but decided to give myself a few extra days to get back on track. I was really excited to think that I had done well. Thinking was my problem. I exercised everyday at Curves this week. I drank water and ate right.
There are a few tricks I try on weigh in day....
1. Light weight clothes...black shorts, T-shirt, and flip flops. Cold don't matter!
2. No water after 3. Pick back up after weigh in.
3. Always always try to go to the bathroom.
I did all those things. So when I got on the scales, I thought ok I've done reasonable well this week...considering the last few weeks have been off! When Mary wrote my weight down, it was only .8 down. You see I gained .6 last week. So that means I only lost .2!!!! Ugh.
I held myself together. I wanted to start boo hooing! Cry and Cry and Cry! But Mary gave me a pep talk and I held it together. I was mad, upset, indifferent...all in about 5 minutes.
When I got to the truck, I still felt the need to cry but I didn't. I called my mom..she was on the phone with Ms. Helen. She was no help. Then my mind started to wonder as I left Ruston. It went right to food. I started thinking ok I can eat whatever I want. I could head to Taco Bell for some Meximelts or Cheeseroll Ups. I could head to KFC for some Original recipe chicken with a biscuit. OR I could go all the way across town(I was trying to get to the ballgame on time) to Subway to eat a much healthier sandwich. I decided to pass the first two and go to Subway even though I didnt want to drive across town.
Then out of the blue I saw the other Subway. Yeah...God is good. I pulled the drive thru, ordered by roasted chicken sandwhich with lettuce tomato, a little cheese, mayo, honey mustard, and onions. Really it was good.
Tonight I made a good choice but I don't always make the best choice. I look forward to the new morning God gives each day!

I think I can I think I can

There are still good times to be had....but right now the times are hard. Sometimes life is a struggle. Sometimes it is hard to keep going and stay on track. I am going through one of those times in life.

Someone asked me about a month or two after I started if I ever cheated. I was really upset. I could not believe she was asking me that! Some people are just not supportive! I was so proud of me and the efforts I made to be healthy and stay on task. And NO I had not cheated. If you asked me that question today, I couldn't' lie. I have cheated. Cheating on my points, cheated myself by not exercising!

The last few weeks have been very hard for me. I have made some really bad choices....really not making good choices!! I have been trying to get back on track but it is so hard. I have been told not to go back. No worries..I am not going back but I just can't seem to go forward. It is like I am stalled.

I tell myself all the time I have lost 107 pounds in 10 months. That is huge. But I have more miles to go, more pounds to lose. I keep giving myself a pep talk. You can do it, you have done well, you are going to continue to do well, you come a long way!

I think I can I think I can....remember The Little Engine That Could?

There was a train that needed help getting over the mountain but no one wanted to help. Only the little blue engine was willing to take on the big task, while saying I think I can I think I can...but he overcame a seemingly impossible task.

Looking at my task, it seems an impossible task. But I THINK I CAN, I THINK I CAN....a lot of people think I can...my whole gang. So my new motto.... I know I can, I know I can.

I know I can do it with His help. Before my feet hit the floor every day, I will pray that He will help me through the rough patches . I will ask that He would help me make the best choices and you know what?

I KNOW HE CAN! I KNOW HE CAN!

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:8

There will be gains!

Ok so I have been on the program for 11 months. And yes there has been some gains. The first time I gained...it was .8...not a big deal. I handled it. It was after 11 weeks. The next week I lost 5 pounds.

Then 8 weeks later...I gained 2 pounds. It was terrible. Diana came in after me and when she asked me how I did...I began to cry. IN THE MEETING. It was awful. Ms. Barbara tried to make it better but I was really upset. I know the others thought I was a little off. Diana laughed at me because I was so upset. (She really is a great friend...she is the reason I got started! She wasn't being mean...she thought I over reacting!) After the meeting, Ms. Mary(WW secretary) and Ms. Barbara(WW leader) felt really sorry for me. They hugged me and told me I could do it! It was a small setback and I had come so far. They really encouraged me that night.

I don't know why this was such a big thing. I had gained once before. But 2 pounds!!!! Silly me I had already lost 76 pounds. I was so afraid that I might go backwards! I had worked so hard in those 5 months...I was having a break down.

That night it was a break down but it was actually a break through too. I don't know when I did it ......but I decided that it was ok. It was a gain but the not the end. I realized there were going to be gains but it didnt matter. I had already been successful. I knew why I had gained and needed to move on from there. The next day was a start over.

You know...the gain was not the real problem. It was the reason I gained. Getting to the bottom of weight gain is so important. Not enough exercise, too much food, not enough water, eating too late....factors that really matter.

I have gained again since then...one time it was 5 pounds!....but I try to handle it in a different way..than tears. Oh it upsets me but now I have to think about what I am doing. I have to change the behavior that caused the gain.

Being healthy and maintaining a healthy weight is going to be a lifetime challenge. I have to know that I have a ways to go and there will be ups and downs. But I am going to try and have more downs than ups.

How hard has it been and F-O-X?

The question I get asked a good bit is Has it been hard? It has been easy. I have a serious motto. The motto actually came from a inspirational talk that I had with Aunt Jackie a long time. Except then I would not listen to her. Be selfish. How? Make choices that were best for me. I had to be selfish so that I could become healthy. OH YEAH I want to look good and be America's Next Top Model...but I want to live. I want to live and have a long happy healthy life.

I think the main reason that it has been easy is because of the prayers and support of family and friends. Family family, school family, church family. I probably have more family than anyone in J'boro. I never realized how many people were worried and concerned for me. People who never told me but I had an influence on them. People who never said a word began to comment on how they were proud of me and that I could do it.

*Footnote* I am not wanting to point anybody out because I don't want to leave any supporters out. BUT I do want to share stories of how God different people to help me succeed.

Candy Fox---Candi is my prayer warrior. When I started, she was there quietly supporting me. Loving me for me, yet praying for me to change and become the best that God designed me to be.

Back when I first started, we would go every Monday and every Tuesday my friends at school would wait for me to announce what I had lost. No matter what I lost or gained...Candi was always encouraging me to keep going. The first Monday night I weighed Candi was home with her husband Steve eating supper. They had prayed and blessed the food and had began to eat when she realized she had not prayed for me on my first weigh day. She started praying right then. I think Steve thought she was losing it.

The God thing ---we figured I was weighing in and she was praying at the same time! I had a good first week. I lost 10.8 my first week! Even though I don't get to see or talk to Candi every day,I know she still prays for me. Candi has been a good friend and a big supporter!

God is good all the time...All the time God is good.

First weigh in and Dear Abby

So I would be blogging all day for the next month if I tried to talk about all the things that have happened since I started losing weight. I just going to hit the highlights.

I think everyone starts January with a New Year's Resolution. I am the first to say that I have been one of those. I am going to lose weight. I am going to read my Bible more. I am going to... Beginning this new year, I made no resolutions. I just started the year.

I am not one to read my horoscope but I do love Dear Abby. And right next to Dear Abby was the horoscope. So I peeked. "You know what you are doing, and you've set a nice standard of forward movement. Aggressive or eager moves only mess with your momentum. Steady wins the race. Continue in your patience, gracious manner." Did I tell you this was published the week after my first weigh in?

Diana and I arrived at Weight Watchers January 7th, 2008. I was worried about weigh in. If you have never been significantly overweight you won't understand. I didn't know how much I weighed or how much the scales would hold. But I went and got on! Hallelujah! It weighed me and did not break. (This was not my first weigh in at WW but I was at my biggest!)

I wish I could remember what the Ms. Barbara (you will hear more about her later) talked about but I have not clue. I just remember thinking I am the biggest one here. I have so much to lose. My weight was the highest I think it had every been. I am going to die a young death. I am going to leave my family and friends. I am never going to get married and have children. I had a lot of thoughts running through my mind.

That Monday night my life changed.

October 2007

October 2007

This is my class field trip to the Pumpkin Patch. Where are my eyes? Look at the sunglasses.

October 2008

This is October 2008. I have eyes! Notice the sunglasses. Same field trip different year.

The beginning - the best place to start.

I should have started this in January when I started my journey. But maybe I can catch up all the things that have happened in the last 10 and 1/2 months.

I will start at the beginning...
January 1st 2008. The girls - my girls from church - came over after the church's watch night service on New Years. They stayed the night and all the next day.....let me remember who was here....Alyssa, Sarah, Jordan, Rachel, Hilary, Ashley, Abbie, Diana....I don't remember anybody else. We stayed in our pj's all day, ate junk and watched all the Love Come Softly DVDs. Like 5 of them! The girls went home at different times throughout the day. There were a few left at 8 the next next day - the first day of the new year - Abbie, Diana, Ashley, and Sarah. I was really ready for them to go. They had been there all day and I was ready to have my house back. I REALLY LOVE THEM!
OK...so somehow we ended watching the Biggest Loser Friends. If you have watched Biggest, you know that the contestants go through certain competitions. This particular night the challenge was for the teams of 2 people carry a hot air balloon(small scale - no basket) attached to them the length of a football field. These people were hurting...they were pushing hard to win. I told Diana that we should go on there. She agreed with me but Sarah had a different opinion. She said "you (talking about Diana) can't do it. You would quit." I helped the with the word determination. Diana was appalled!

So this began the discussion!!! We decided we would try our own Biggest Loser with teams and prizes. Our teams would be Diana & Ashley. Then it would be me, Sarah(of course - because Diana had no determination) & Abbie. Sarah would be my encourager and Abbie the personal trainer. Diana suggested we start Weight Watchers. I relunctantly agreed. Outwardly I agreed but on the inside I had my doubts. My thoughts were ok we will try it AGAIN. I even tried to get Diana to start later than she wanted but she would not have it. We had to start the next Monday. One week later we were sitting in Weight Watchers.

My reality hit when I got on the scales. Ok here it goes...I am going to let you know how much I weighed....436... yep....me too. I had gotten there. Ok, you are probably saying "I wouldn't dare post what I weigh" ME either then but I am far from that weight and I am headed to a new healthier weight and am not going back. So goodbye 436. And hello new me.