Eyesbrowns and broken toenails

So here I am finally arrived in Sioux Falls, SD. I am sitting with Diana, Pro-Zack, AJ, Ashley, and B Randy. It took us 19 hours 30 minutes and 7 seconds, 1 hotel, two dozen cupcakes, Outback, McDonalds, DQ, penciled in eyesbrowns, fingernail polish remover, broken toenail, running a mile to get a bag, numerous jokes about me and Cradle, tons of laughs, a few tears, a lost ring, millions of text messages, Facebook stalkings, bikes and tattoos, Pro-Zack's two new friends, and talking to each other in our sleeep but we are here and excited!

We had the best time in Shreveport this week! Diana, Ashley, Rachel and I went to World Changers in Shreveport, the Boardwalk, and to see Aunt Jackie. I have to say where ever we go, we like to have a good time. We don't even care what people think. We were trying on hats and sunglasses and I suddenly I realized we had drawn attention. We were having such a good time that we didn't care that people might find us goofy! So if we brought a smile to someone's day....I'll keep trying on hats and sunglasses!

World Changer

World Changers came and went in a blur. In the days before we left, I was worried and hesitate not about the work but the heat. I absolutely love WC but there are always some worries before leaving. There are thoughts of excitement and worry. Then before you know it the days have flown by and your back home wishing you were back at World Changers! Eight days ago.....

Day 1... I got to the church late! Not too late just everyone waiting on me and the truck so we could load up. Everyone was super excited to get on the road. We had to head north to turn and go south! We went through Monroe and on to Jackson then headed south toward New Orleans. But we finally arrived after 2 stops for the bathroom, one stop for lunch, two stops for the tarp, and one stop for gas. It took us 7 hours! But we arrived on time!

Day 2.... Dumpsters! That is our crew name for the week! It was exciting to meet everyone from different places! Michaela - Texas! Craziest thing you will find! Olivia - Texas --Excited!
Kandis - Texas! Initial thoughts...quiet! I was wrong! Charles - Crew Chief - laid back! Jennifer - Louisiana! Reserved. Alexis Louisiana! Silent! Our other two members were coming in later. We went to worship at Trinity Baptist at Franklinton. That church is fabulous! They treated us like family.

Day 3...Work Day 1. It was hot. But that is not the hard part. It seemed like we had trouble getting started. We had two crews at our work site. The roofing team had to do some things before we could get started. It was hard to encourage the crew when I needed encouragement myself. We did very little Monday but I continued to pray for God to use us. Worship was amazing. Scott invited us to the altar to write down (on sticky notes) anything that was standing between us and our relationship with Jesus.

Day 4...Work Day 2...Yeah we finally worked today. I got paint on me. Our crew picked up because we actually got to do what we came to WC to do. Worship on Tuesday was my favorite. Concert of Prayer was the most awesome night. It was nice to go in and sit quietly. I think the most impressive thing was when Scott, Bethany, and David walked to the cross, where the sticky notes were, and began to shred them. It was an amazing moment. It has nothing to do with those three people. It was all about how Jesus takes our burdens and we can let it go.

Day 5...Work Day 3...only a half day of work and a half day of play! We had the best time with our group in New Orleans. Riverwalk, Bubba Gumps(coconut shrimp! YUM!), and Cafe De Monde. And the marathon we ran to get back to the van! Quincy was trying to get Kylie to the bathroom. Then the party! We busted up a 10 year anniversary for fraternity at the Hilton trying to get back to the van!

Day 6....Work Day 4...We worked hard getting the whole house painted! Our crew pulled together and worked so good together. It is amazing how God puts together a team and how you grow to love each and everyone of them!

Day 7....Final day of work! We had a busy day trying to finish so we could go to Sonic. It was hot and humid! It started off with rain but finished with sunshine and Sonic. Our crew pulled together and God used us! Later that night.....after closing celebration..I was walking out of the church and I ran into our home owner's family. I was so excited. But the best news...thirteen year old Allison gave her life and heart to Jesus. I was so excited I wanted to tell everyone. Strange thing...I was disappointed because we didn't get to spend much time with the during the week. But God works in amazing ways. Seems that Allison was watching from the window and porch. She and her brothers fell in love with me and I didn't even know. I guess you can be a witness to someone even through a window.

Day 8...the day to go home. Saying goodbye was hard. I really truly believe that some of our friends from WC 09 we will see again. They are friends for a lifetime. Diana and I are making plans to visit Texas! There was some grouchiness on the way home mostly from being tired. But everyone was glad for a great week, new friends, and to going home to our own beds.

I love World Changers and cannot wait until next year! God is amazing and awesome!

If your happy and you know it....

First of all, thanks everyone who continues to read my blog.

Sometimes I just don't know what to write but I found something to write about.

Writing is like therapy! Recently I got my feelings hurt because I wasn't included. It really bothered me. My feelings where hurt and I am usually tough as nails. I didn't understand why I was left out and still don't. Besides all of that, it made me think about how many times that I probably left someone out and it hurt their feelings like it did mine. Maybe God used this to teach me a lesson. I don't like learning lesson sometimes! I'm going to do better.

People like to be around me I hope! I like to have a good time. I like to be around people. I love to laugh and make people smile. My mother tells me people just like to be around me. I guess it's from my great personality(HA) not too humble though!

I think the joyful attitude started with actually pretending. People don't like to be around people who are negative. I had a lot to be negative about when I was a kid. Mainly because I was the largest one in every situation. So instead of turning in I turned out. Laughing, having fun, being happy so people liked me even though I was overweight.

I think overtime people just grew to overlook my weight and love me for my fun personality. My mother always worried that I couldn't be serious. I know when to be serious and all the other time love life. So people liked to be around me because I am happy. As I grew older, it became me. I don't remember when I decided to be happy all the time and forget about my weight. As large as I was and still am, it never stopped me.

My weight watcher leader told when I received my 1oo pound award that she remembered a very sad looking young lady who walked through the doors of WW. I never felt unhappy. I guess I just looked it during that time.

Hey don't think that I don't have depressing days I do but most of the time I AM HAPPY! So everyone don't worry be happy!

I know you probably raised an eyebrow when I said pretending. I guess overtime I just got tired of pretending. I really do love life and like to have a good time. If you like me good, if you don't I don't care! I am going to be happy and have fun and love life! I have a Savior who loves me and cherishes me. So I'm happy and I know it!

In a newsletter

I wanted to share the article that was in the Curves newsletter from this month. First I must tell you that a couple of weeks ago Cindy Nunn(from Curves) told me that she wanted to feature me in the newsletter. I thought wow! I am always impressed with the ladies that are featured each month. Now she was asking me! Wow I say. It took us a couple of tries and finally we were about to talk. Cindy told me that I could answer then now or bring them by to her later.

Some of the questions were Would I recommended Curves and Why?
How has it helped me? Health related? Any obstacles? How do I stay committed?
Atmosphere?

The next day I brought the questions and answers back to her. We also talked and I shared some other things with her. Cindy is the sweetest thing and so encouraging! She told me she would work on it and run it by me before printing it.

A few days went by and she called me. She wanted to get my approval. As she read it to me, I was amazed at how she took what I told her and developed it! I had tears in my eyes as she shared it with me over the phone.

I wanted to share it with all of you ... my support! Remember the reason for the article is to promote Curves but it did way more than that for me.

The following is the article:

A CURVES STAR: SHE IS HALF WAY THERE AND CONTINUES TO PRESS ON

CURVES MEMBER LAURA SPANGLER, IS ON A MISSION. A MISSION TO TAKE CARE OF HER HEALTH. IN JANUARY 2008, LAURA DECIDED TO BEGIN HER WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM WHICH INCLUDES HEALTHILY EATING AND EXERCISE. SHE SET A GOAL OF INCREMENTS OF 30-50 POUNDS OF WEIGHT LOSS UNTIL SHE IS DOWN TO HER GOAL WEIGHT OF 176. HER BEGINNING WEIGHT: 438 LBS. TO DATE, LAURA HAS LOST 111 POUNDS! THAT ACHIEVEMENT IS SO ADMIRABLE AND SHE WILL BE THE FIRST TO TELL YOU, IT IS HARD WORK. SHE HAS TO DO THE WORK BUT ALSO STATES THAT LOVE , SUPPORT, AND ACHIEVEMENT OF HER FAMILY AND FRIENDS IS INSTRUMENTAL IN HELPING HER OBTAIN HER GOAL. FOR INSTANCE, SHE SAYS "MY FRIENDS AND I CALL CURVES OUR "THERAPY SESSIONS!" WE WORK OUT, TALK AND RELEASE DAILY STRESS. FINDING EXTRA TIME TO EXERCISE IS HARD BUT THAT IS WHAT IS GREAT ABOUT CURVES. IT ONLY TAKES 30 MINUTES 3 TIMES A WEEK. I WOULD RECOMMEND IT TO ANYONE WHO HAS A BUSY LIFESTYLE. SOMETIMES I HAVE TO DISCIPLINE MYSELF TO GO BUT I STAY MOTIVATED KNOWING THAT I HAVE FRIENDS WAITING ON ME WHO HAVE ALSO REAPED THE BENEFITS FROM THE CURVES WORKOUT. SHE IS HALF WAY THERE! WATCH HER THIS TIME NEXT YEAR. SHE WILL REACH HER GOAL. SHE, HER FAMILY, FRIENDS AND SISTERS AT CURVES ARE GOING TO CONTINUE TO ENCOURAGE HER TO SEE HER DREAM BECOME A REALITY. WE TRULY LOVE AND ADMIRE YOU, LAURA. PRESS ON!


I was so proud of that piece! Cindy did a great job of taking my answers and our talk and turning it into some so special. I know that it was a way of promoting Curves but it increased my motivation!

Thanks Cindy! She even told me that her husband proof reads everything and he was inspired/motivated by it!


"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8-9

The Voices in my Head

I cannot describe not only how hard it is to lose weight but also to keep it off. I still have 152 pounds to go and it is hard.

Every thought or decision that I make deals with my weight loss. What to eat or not, exercise or not, what time to eat, how much exercise, too much too little, can I get away this or not, can't I just enjoy this one thing, what will the scales say. Weight encompasses your entire life.

Disappointment sets in.

I get so much negative talk and thoughts from myself.

I skipped Weight Watchers meetings for several weeks and Curves for a couple of weeks. Last week I hit the exercise circuit hard. Pushing myself to get to the new goal I have. 30 pounds by the first week of school which by the way is around my birthday. I want to be under 300 pounds by the time I am 35. So 299 by August 15th. I don't care who knows what I weigh. I don't want to go back and I don't want to stay here either!

So I worked so hard on the exercise. The food part is harder than the exercise. Cravings! It's so hard.

So I worked my tail off and went back to WW tonight. When I weighed in tonight, I had lost .8.
I felt the disappointment rising in me. I know I really lost 3.8 pounds. See I had gained 3 pounds while not working out. But the disappointment is still there. Funny thing is it makes me what to eat something naughty. The feelings creep up inside of me to say "I am going to throw my hands up and say I DON'T CARE I'M EATING IT. I'LL DEAL IT WITH IT TOMORROW."

I hate to hear life is hard. Yeah I know. It is hard. Life is hard. Dieting is hard. Waiting is hard. Staying on track is hard.

Sometimes I get tired of the fight. But then there is the voice that I hear say. Don't go backwards. Then I hear another voice say I am proud of you. Another You can do it. NO its not the voices in my head. At least not my own voice. It's Daniel, Mama, Jason, Susie, Abbie, Diana, my girls, Tina, Pennie, Janie, Chastity, Ms. Laura(WW), Michawn, Melissa....just to name a few......if I didn't name you....you are just as important......oh it is so many familiar voices that love me and want me not only to succeed but to live. But more importantly it's the Holy Spirit's voice saying I with you...trust Me.....Rely on Me.

It is hard. And you know the reality. It's never going to be easy. Now or when I reach goal. Not going to be easy. But I am glad to know that I have a huge support group whispering in my ear telling me to keep moving toward the goal to be the best that God has designed me to be.

299 hear I come by August 15!

Never get a second chance to make a first impression

It's been a while since I wrote. Life has been kinda been stinkin' boring the last month.

I have been really thinking about writing again but really couldn't think of anything worth writing about. Then yesterday my mind was running with thoughts while getting ready for church.

The thoughts started while washing my hair; thinking about if I should wear it curly or straight. Then I thought should I wear my brown skirt or new cute white shirt. I struggle every time I go somewhere with what to wear. I usually go through several outfits before settling on something. I try to pick out the night before but sometimes I have to try on numerous things before I can get out the door.

My thoughts of how to look to get out the door turned into thoughts about first impressions. As a single girl this is very important. I have to walk out the door looking like I am ready to go meet my prince. What if I look like I just rolled out of bed? Not a good impression. For the last few days, I have been getting up, bathing, fixing hair enough to get out the door, putting on clothes to exercise in. Least to say...not too impressive. Functional!

For people that have known me, you have loved me and didn't care my size. You loved me for me.

I am so glad to have friends in my life that don't look at the outward appearance that look at my heart. Those are the people who matter. Those people can see the change I've been through. Those are the people who will be invited to the party.For all the others...

Unless you have been extremely obese, you might not understand this. But when you are overweight the looks that you get from people are astounding. They may have not said anything but I could imagine what they were saying with their eyes. Up and down looks. Wondering how I could have gotten to that point. I don't really get those looks that say pathetic as much. But I still wonder about what people are thinking of me even at the overweight size I am now. Sometimes it makes me what to scream to people....you just don't know! I would love to wear a T-shirt that has a before and after picture.

Sometimes I feel the need to show my picture of before and after to people who didn't know me before. A couple of months ago some friends of mine got together with some friends of theirs and we all ended being friends. This new guy and I became instant friends laughing and cutting up. After we had been out for a while, I felt that need to show him my picture. He told me he didn't need see my picture that I was beautiful the way I was. Oh my. (He was a playa!)

But you know he was right. I've been beautiful for a long time. Even before he recognized it.

Since I can remember 1 Samuel 16:7 has been my favorite verse.

1 Samuel 16:7 (New International Version)
7 But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

First impressions are largely based on the outward appearance. Like it or not that is society. I know that I will still worry about making a good first impression based on the outward appearance but I pray that my heart will show through and that is what people will walk away saying she is a beautiful person because of that.